On Saturday, Meadows, Jay, Marcia, Nate, Nathaniel, and I hit up the second of our nine bobblehead nights at PNC Park – Tom Gorzelanny bobblehead night. While Gorzo didn’t even pitch, he did make a statement with his bobblehead. His middle finger is sticking out of the glove on his right hand, and despite the Pirates organization acting like it’s not that obvious, trust me, it is. I wish I had a photo of his hand up close because you can clearly see his the knuckles of his index, ring, and pinky fingers, leaving just his trusty old eff you finger out. Now, I remember leaving my index finger out of my glove when I played little league, but the middle? Even the photo on the bobblehead box, shows his index finger out. The fact that the thing made the news also makes Pittsburgh seem a bit ridiculous.

To match the incompetence of the company the Pirates paid to make their bobbleheads, the Buccos made a laughable effort of the game itself, losing 8-4 to the Phillies. The three errors in that game only assisted in keeping the Pirates in the lead for most errors in baseball. Since we have the first row in the upper deck, we’re contemplating starting “The E Club”, where we’ll post a large printout of an E over the railing in similar fashions to the “K” that gets posted for each strikeout. Right now, the Pirates are averaging a little over 1 error per game, so it’s not a bad idea.

In other news, my beloved O’s are off to a flying start. Oh, how I wish the season didn’t run so long. Can they possibly keep up this pace? I sure hope so, but that division sucks as far as the odds go thanks to the damn Yankees and Red Sox. Ugh.

Friday night may qualify as the best sporting event I’ve ever been to. With the Pens down 3-0 to the Rangers in the middle of the second period, a few lucky puck bounces, some great passing, hard work, and solid finishing allowed the Penguins to come back and win 5-4 in regulation. It was absolutely ridiculous. I’m not sure if I’ve ever been in a crowd as insane as the one at Mellon on Friday.

Down 3 goals, the Pens scored on a friendly deflection from Ruutu. Before we could even take our seats again, the Pens scored again. The same situation would happen again later in the game – 2 goals in less than 20 seconds. It was such an emotional roller coaster as the Pens came out playing comically bad, and then, as if the talent switch got turned on, the Pens started playing really well and dominating the game in every way. This team has become scary-good. I just hope they leave the lapses at home when they go to Madison Square Garden on Tuesday.

On top of the great comeback, the Penguins players requested a “whiteout” where all of the fans would wear white in the stands. Since the Pens organization knew the request would fall on many deaf ears in Pittsburgh – resulting in numerous people wearing their black, blue, and yellow jerseys from various periods in the club’s history – we all received white playoff t-shirts to help make the whiteout a real possibility. Here is the result:

Last night was the last night of our bowling league, and fortunately for our team, we had something to play for – the championship. In our league, the winner of the first half of the league and the second half of the league go head-to-head for all of the bragging rights…and money. Our team finished third in the second half of the league, but won the first half (without me). Even though I came into our team as a replacement for the second half, I was allowed to roll for us, and roll we did.

The team we were playing had taken all 7 points from us the last time we played, so we knew that it was going to be hard. We had to win two games out of 3 to win, and we bowled better than ever as a team. I rolled a 193 and a 183, which wasn’t anywhere near my best, but it was good enough to not hurt our team as we won the first two games. It was awesome to see our team get clutch marks in game one, which came down to the final frame. It was an awesome battle, and for the first time this session, we didn’t collapse. Well, I should say that I didn’t collapse. My poor bowling in the mid-to-late part of the session cost us winning the second half. Q, who had a 147 average coming in, actually bowled a 220 in game one, which kept pace with the guy on their team who bowled a 240. Even Mike, who has the lowest average on our team, picked his game up a lot, bowling in the 130s and 140s. It was awesome.

The fact that our opponents (and just about every other team in the league) were so bitter about our team winning only made winning the championship that much sweeter. Sorry, fellas. If you don’t like the handicap system, join a scratch league. Of course, you wouldn’t seem like such big fish in one of those, huh?

We heard complaining all season about how our team was given so many pins each game, but the reality was that our team had the weakest bowlers in it. None of us have even been bowling for an entire year yet, so of course we’re going to come into the league with low averages. Our inexperience also means that we’re in the best position to improve dramatically throughout the league’s duration. None of us have hit our plateau like a lot of the older guys we bowl with, so week-to-week, we were going to have a good chance to bowl well over our averages.

Anyway, the fact that our entire team finally showed up at the same time – and more importantly, when it mattered – was a miracle, and I’m quite proud of that.

Also, despite my mental collapse for about 6 straight weeks (18 games), where I probably only bowled my average or better 3 games, I was able to hold onto most improved with a 166 average – 27 pins better than the 139 I started with. I wish I could say that I sandbagged, but 139 was really where I was at in week 1.

While I don’t like the attitude of a lot of the people in the league, I did meet some cool guys, and I know our team had a lot of fun improving and learning. Maybe that’s why we won…we were just having fun.

If someone had come up to me about a month ago and asked me for a good place to grab food in South Side, the odds would’ve been fairly high that The Library would be my recommendation. I mean, I’ve touted The Library’s food as supreme ever since it opened (about 2 years ago, I think), and I can’t really count the amount of times that my friends and I would default to hitting up this known, yet never overly-crowded, bar/restaurant on Carson St.

The atmosphere was relaxed and the library theme was well thought out, even boasting a real card catalog as part of the décor. The food and drink menus are printed on the inside of random books (nice touch), and the beer selection is solid, with a nice array of microbrews and domestics rotating on the taps – with even more interesting selections in bottles. Granted, this is no Sharp Edge for beer choices, but it’s quite good.

Unfortunately, my most recent trip to one of my (formerly) favorite spots, was probably my last. One undeniable highlight of The Library was its delicious appetizers. The Edgar Allen Sweet Potato Fries were the best sweet potato fries in Pittsburgh, and their chicken strips (the clever name escapes me, unfortunately) with Guinness dipping sauce were unreal. Well, I can’t emphasize the word “were” enough. Steve, the original Chef when The Library opened had created a beautiful menu full of house-created, made-from-scratch recipes, and he took a certain pride in making sure you enjoyed your meal, constantly coming out to talk to you about the food and how you like it…or disliked it.

Well, Steve left The Library, and although his personable self was no longer roaming the dining room and bar, Steve’s excellent tastes in food still reigned…until sometime in the past few weeks. The sweet potato fries? Now over-sweetened, dry, and typical. The jalapeno dipping sauce? No bite. The chicken strips, although still breaded perfectly, lack the one thing that really made them better than the rest of the chicken strip options scattering the food and brew-saturated South Side – the Guinness dipping sauce. At first, I figured it was just an oversight by the plate prep guys, but no…

According to the most boring, and useless bartender I’ve encountered in Pittsburgh (even the bartenders are a step down in quality), the cost of making the Guinness sauce was too much, so they replaced it with some raspberry crap that was just like any other sauce made by a place trying to be “unique” and “gourmet”. Note to these places; fruity sauces are over-used. You’re not unique or fancy.

Sorry, Jeff, but your establishment must’ve hit its plateau when it first opened. While I’m sure there are still some great options on the menu, the fact that two of my beer-drinker munchies fallbacks have drifted into the category of shite, has simply ruined my desire to test your new menu. The slow, beer-IQ-lacking, bartenders you employ have only enhanced the reality that The Library – like its brick and mortar relative – is a mere shell of it’s once great self. While I’ll still keep you in mind, I imagine you’ll fall by the wayside while picking a favorite dining destination. The Library once shined and rose above the disgusting-food littered selections of Carson St.. You could really tell they cared, and the quality of the food made you crave it. Nevermore.

Oh, and thanks for finally opening for lunch…now that your quality has been on the floor for longer than the 10-second rule allows. Here’s to the optimism that hopes The Library improves. Until then…

My idiots guide to voting for the President of our great democracy always started with the bumper sticker debate. If you’re completely apathetic, or incapable of forming your own educated opinion, just drive around (rush hour is recommended), and every time some jackhole cuts you off, doesn’t use a turn signal, drive 10 miles under the posted speed limit, rubbernecks, gets in an accident, drives while reading or preening, etc., take a quick look at their car. Does that person have a supporters bumper sticker for either candidate?

If so, remember that. Tally your results. Then when election day comes, simply vote for the person who has the least number of total morons supporting them. Just as you may correctly judge a person by the company they keep, you can probably judge your candidate based on the idiots who support him (or her). Driving is such a great measure of a person. It takes intelligence, logic, reasoning, focus, and confidence to drive well. It takes thinking ahead, planning, and execution. If a person can’t drive, what makes you think they can vote with any semblance of intelligence? Are they equally slow and hesitant with they’re opinion as they are to change a lane?

While I’m sort of kidding, the reality is that election season bring out the morons en mass; resembling Romero’s Land of the Dead zombies who, while evolved a little more than their predecessors, are still complete idiots. That movie was awful, by the way.

Anyway, I’m so sick of this election already. McCain is playing the game too safe in such turbulent times. He’s too much of a politician for me to trust, and he proves it daily as he sits back and watches the idiot democrats make mistake after mistake. Of course, the mistakes that he’s watching aren’t really mistakes at all, but media-hyped nonsense that really doesn’t matter when it comes to the actual job of being the President of this stumbling democracy. Does Hillary’s embellishment of bullet-dodging trips to Bosnia really matter? Really? Does what Obama’s pastor say to his congregation immediately mean that everyone in that congregation is really following, and that he’s unfit to be President? I rarely paid attention in church, so I’m a bad judge on that one.

Is Obama talking too much? Maybe, but he’s not saying anything that isn’t true. This pathetic, woe-is-me society, can’t take honesty. There’s actually a lot of truth in the following statements made by Obama:

“You go into these small towns in Pennsylvania and, like a lot of small towns in the Midwest, the jobs have been gone now for 25 years and nothing’s replaced them. And they fell through the Clinton Administration, and the Bush Administration, and each successive administration has said that somehow these communities are gonna regenerate and they have not.”

“And it’s not surprising then they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.”

Can you honestly tell me that he’s wrong? I’ve spent the last 5 years in economically depressed towns in Pennsylvania. I lived in Johnstown, and now Pittsburgh, and what Senator Obama said isn’t far from the truth. The problem is that people don’t want to hear the truth. Instead of spending a few minutes of raw introspection and realizing that, “yeah, I guess he’s right”, and trying to figure out solutions, they’ll condemn the man for his brutally honest views. Sorry, he hurt your feelings, Cletus.

Is he an elitist? Who cares? This media-hyped discussion and over-examination is so goofy. The President of the United States is almost always going to be an elitist. Do you think Dubya isn’t one? McCain? Hillary? To get there, they’ve mostly attended elitist universities and institutions. They’ve made inflated political salaries, and have been handed the feeling of entitlement and power. Hillary, McCain, all of them – elitists. If you think that any of these candidates really, and I mean, really understands the America people, you’re a tool playing into the media hype and political jargon. You’re probably the idiot who just cut me off with your crooked Hillary ‘08 bumper sticker (by the way, a crooked bumper sticker shows me that you’re even more of an idiot because you can’t figure out how to put a sticker on something straight).

Anyway, for those swerving dolts and those who sit at green lights and extend my 5 mile commute to nearly a half-an-hour, please just look at this election in the simplest terms possible as you shuffle to find your turn signal. Look at the last few years and ask yourself what’s changed in your own life. I have a friend who doesn’t vote and he says that it doesn’t affect him. Have fun with that house search, bro. Myopia and the apathy based on that mentality is the worst thing this country has ever been affected by.

People say they don’t want to pay for national health care with more taxes. When I look at my paycheck and how I get fiscally raped bi-weekly, I understand…for a minute. That mentality is reasonable when you’ve got a job, but what if you get cancer, or you’re in an accident. An acute injury or disease could put you out of a job, or leave you broke with medical bills. Of course, why would anyone think of that? They think that the only people who are going to benefit from national health care are the “freeloaders”, but a lot of deserving people will as well. That “deserving” person could be you someday. You do realize that most of your money is going to pay for those inflated pharmaceutical prices, right? You worry about gas prices? Look in your medicine cabinet. That’s a profit margin so ridiculous that George Orwell probably couldn’t have imagined it. You’ve gotta love legalized chemical dependency.

Issue after issue, there are tons of examples of this idiot mentality. This me-first thought process when voting makes me lose hope in our future. It’s not about me, it’s not about you. It’s not even about today. It’s all about tomorrow.

Frankly, I just want change. I’m willing to vote for Obama simply because he isn’t experienced. He’s not jaded. His idealism might scare many, but look at what the politicos we’ve dealt with for the last however amount of years have accomplished. Recession, pharmaceutical rule, unemployment, declining education standards, skyrocketing higher education costs, uncontrolled illegal immigration, cynicism and apathy. Weeeeee! Hop on the political slide. It’s fun for a second and when you come to a stop, you’re at the bottom. Ride this media wave, and let them influence you. Take that prescription of injected, biased news (conservative or liberal), and enjoy the high. Vote while you’re stoned on this info, and keep the world rolling, so we don’t have to actually stop and think, or be witness to it all. Maybe I’ll peddle blinders outside of voting places come November.

Just like you’ll drive through the ghetto fast, but never think about why you’re in fear. Or you’ll walk by that homeless guy and in your own “elitist” fashion act like you don’t have any money even when you’re pocket is full of change because you think he can fix his life. Sometimes you’re right, sometimes you’re wrong, but you’re no better than Obama for questioning his financial situation, you elitist prick.

Welcome to democracy – year 2008. The year of the spun voter. Year of the safe candidate winning because change isn’t what we need…obviously…I mean…look around. More guns, more glory. Financial divide. Terrorism. Fear. Quick fixes. Freedom. Patriotism. God. Liberal. Conservative. Abortion. Foreclosure. Keywords, people. Eat ‘em up. Chew it, chew it. Make sure you chew enough so you don’t choke. It’ll also improve your digestion of the hard to dissolve. What’s that? War is necessary for our national security. Can I put some ketchup on that? Does it come with a side of hate and ignorance? What’s for dessert?

Of course, Obama can’t have my vote…he claimed yesterday that he’s been a Steelers fan his whole life. Ha ha. Maybe that’s the one thing that I’ll cling to when the election rolls around. I’d hate to actually put thought into who ruins, or improves America over the next 4 years.

I guess I should stop typing this while I drive…

I had the pleasure – albeit short-lived – of going to the Pirates/Reds game on Friday and having awesome seats on the third baseline. I don’t think I’ve ever sat in seats this close to the action before so I was pretty excited to take in a game with such a prime vantage point.

Unfortunately, the weather ruined what could’ve been a great night at PNC Park. Shortly after failing to get Joe, Nate, Jay, and Marsha into the empty seats to the left of me, the lightning started…followed by a downpour…followed by hail…followed by me leaving and going to SoHo to catch the third period of the Pens game. In reality, Pens playoff hockey is a lot more exciting than an early season Bucs game, but I couldn’t pass up these seats and the Manny Sanguillen bobblehead. Usually Pirates games on Fridays, combined with a bobblehead promotion, bring solid crowds, but I guess the weather and the Pens game kept most people at home.

Anyway, the Pens game was a much better payoff as they won with a minute left in the 3rd period. The Pirates won as well after the rain delay, 1-0 (exciting, eh?). I’m just hoping that the next game that I have a ticket to in the same seats, I don’t have to worry about rain. Of course, this is Pittsburgh – home of the rain delay.

Walking into PNC Park for a nice, rainy evening…

Pre-game warmups in the foreground…angry clouds in the distance…

Jose Bautista practicing avoiding an error…

Baseball boredom

The Pirate Parrot

I remember going to one of the playoff games last year when the Penguins faced the Senators, and seeing the Pens best performance of the series fall into the “not good enough” category. Last year’s team just wasn’t ready for playoff hockey. They were young, inexperienced, and outplayed in every facet of the game.

Last night, though, was a different story. The Pens basically dominated the entire 60 minutes. The only times during the game where the Pens should have lost momentum – the insane number of times the Senators were on the power play – they killed the penalties with confidence. It was a complete performance, and I’m glad I was there to see a game that rivaled the intensity in the stands. The Pens scored 1:08 into the game, setting the tone, and never looked back.

There were so many memorable moments, but watching Ryan Whitney beat the hell out of a Senator, Max Talbot come to Fleury’s aid, and Gary Roberts – at 41 years of age – scoring 2 goals and getting ejected definitely make the shortlist. Let’s see if this team can keep their composure this Friday for game 2.

Let’s go Pens!

Pre-game

And the puck drops to begin the Stanley Cup Playoffs…

Malkin and crew dominating the hapless Senators

Gary Roberts melee

Fight cleanup after player ejections…

Iceburgh, the Pens mascot…

Game over.

I don’t know this person…

Even though Shutter received only 8 percent on rottentomatoes – deeming it the most rotten movie I’ve ever decided to see in spite of their rating – my penchant for horror flicks overtook me and I went anyway.

I’m not sure if it was thaaaaaat bad, but it wasn’t anything spectacular, either. While Shutter does maintain that Japanese horror flick vibe – in location, story, and direction – it does stop short of being just another Ring rip-off. I’m sure there are about 50 Japanese horror flicks that this does mimic, but since I haven’t seen most of them, Shutter makes for a decent thriller.

There’s a good story behind this short, yet slow-paced flick, but most viewers will probably find the movie too clichéd and a little boring. Shutter could’ve benefited from the more formulaic approach to horror to bump the entertainment value, but as it is, it just comes off as another indie-like horror film with that all too familiar Japanese creepiness.