My only experience with the Guitar Hero franchise was at a Best Buy about 6 months ago. I tried to play Danzig’s “Mother” for about a minute and promptly decided that it wasn’t worth the effort.

I guess my time and effort has taken a price cut because on Sunday Davis and I spent around 7 hours playing Guitar Hero III. I have to admit that it was a lot more fun that I had expected. We managed to beat the game on medium, which isn’t a really a great accomplishment. At least not in a society overrun with lazy children with amazing hand-eye coordination who never leaving the house thanks to games like this. I digress. It felt like a decent accomplishment for us, especially after the annoyingly difficult final battle between me and Lucifer (Lou) on “The Devil Went Down to Georgia”.

I should also add that the songs that were chosen for the most part are really good, and it’s funny how this game forced me to appreciate the guitar parts of songs that I never really paid much attention to. I guess that happens when you’re forced to listen to the same song 20 times or more. Ha ha.

Anyway, I always thought that I would hate the game because I can play guitar at a relatively high level, and despite the shape of the controller – in this case a Les Paul – it’s pretty far from really playing guitar. In some ways I’m completely on-point. Naturally, I hate the fact that you don’t really strum the way that you would on a guitar. The game forces you to ignore a lot of strokes which is really difficult on songs that I actually know well, since I would be strumming the notes when they were actually being sounded and not when the little indicators were telling me to. It’s just unnatural at this point for songs that I know.

The other thing that I’m not totally sold on is the controller. Guitar is really easy for me because I can slide my hand up and down on the strings quickly and I don’t find myself lost too often, but the GH controller has 5 buttons and I really have trouble maneuvering between the two positions that I’ve sort of defined for myself (index finger on green to pinkie on blue, and index finger on red to pinkie on orange). I often find myself in between two buttons and unable to recover once I lose my place on the tiny “fretboard”.

Anyway, all complaints of my inability to adapt to the silly controller are basically moot since endless amounts of people, guitar players and non-guitar players, have mastered this game. We’ve started going through the hard level, so hopefully things get better quickly. Sadly, I’ll probably master this game while my guitars gather dust in the next room. I can’t wait until Rock Band comes out and Davis and I decide that we can sell all of our real music equipment because our virtual band just takes up less room and we don’t have to leave the house for gigs!

So, I made the 3+ hour drive to Buffalo today for the Ravens/Bills game. I’m going make this a short review because there’s not much to say.

I’ll begin with the fans. The fans are good people…and you have to respect their loyalty after everything the franchise has been through. I had a good time with them, and didn’t hear gloating when I walked out, didn’t get harassed during the game, and shared quite a few beers with the people next to me. Great people.

The stadium was…well…really old. It felt so far removed from modern day NFL stadiums. The stadium structure was just cinder blocks and concrete with nothing disguising its basic construction. The seats were bleachers, the bathrooms sported the trough-style urinals, and the steps didn’t have any handrails. Weird, but cool, in that nostalgic way.

My notes on the game are simple:

1. McGahee is really coming around. His touchdown run was phenomenal, and he did a good job of silencing some of the boos as the game went on.
2. Boller is just not the guy. I still like his vertical ability, but he missed some very, very open passes by at least 2 figurative miles. Dude, you’re not a rookie anymore. Quit getting frazzled so easily. Edwards did a much better job.
3. I hate Brian Billick…as a play caller. The end of the game shows why he is just another overrated coach who stumbled upon a Super Bowl victory. When you have 2nd and 1 and you absolutely need a first down to keep the drive alive, just worry about the 1st down. RUN THE DAMN BALL. QB sneak the damn thing for all I care. Lining up in shotgun and throwing on 2nd, 3rd, AND 4th blows my mind.
4. 3rd and long. Why, oh why must every series start with 2 short plays followed by false starts, leaving us with 3 and long? In Billicks mind, only the following plays are allowed on 1st or 2nd down. A) Screen pass for +1/-1 yard, B) Run up the middle, and C) 5-yard pass in tight coverage. If C is used, the discipline-less, young O-line must commit a false start. Essentially, every series must end in 3rd and long.
5. We were doing a great job of going deep on 3rd and long, and if Boller had hit his open receivers, we would’ve done even better. Why didn’t we try that on any 1st downs?
6. My favorite play of the game was Mark Claytons end-around, the pass to Boller. It didn’t work because Boller has two bricks attached to his wrists, but it was a ballsy call, and one that at least made the offense exciting to watch…even if for only one play.

At the end of the day, I experienced new fans, another stadium, and a close game. I love the Ravens, but they’re far from exciting or convincing to watch. Until the offense can put 21 points a game on the board, it’s going to a tough season. The defense is still very good, and considering the fact that half of the team’s best players were on the bench or operating at recovery speed (Ogden, Heap, McNair, McAlister, Terry, Ray), they’re still capable of a 10-6 season, at the very least. They just need to score. Period.

As all 2 of you who read this blog knows, I had a minor annoyance with NFLshop.com’s inept sewing department. Well, they did send me return labels (Tight!), so I guess I should see that money back on my credit card soon. Anyway, one of my goals during this mini-trip to Baltimore was to get a new authentic jersey. Unfortunately, they don’t sell authentic jerseys at the stadium…nor anywhere near the stadium. This was a very unfortunate situation because I had left my backup Ed Reed jersey at home by mistake, and I entered the stadium wearing a white t-shirt – not exactly the outfit that screams I DROVE FROM PITTSBURGH TO SUPPORT MY FAVORITE TEAM AND I SWEAR I’M NOT A TOURIST POSER FAN. My banking on the availability of an authentic at the stadium left me with a small dilemma – what to buy to feel like part of the crowd on game day? My answer? A Haloti Ngate replica home jersey. It definitely made me happy to be in purple, so I’m fine with the extra cash wasted. Later, on the drive home, I stopped at Modell’s on Reisterstown Rd. to get my new authentic. The stitching was perfect, so at least I wasn’t crazy for expecting something better from NFLshop.com. Oh, and it was so pleasing to be in a store that had tons of merchandise for the O’s and Ravens. It made me want to move back. Anyway, onto the game…

…almost. On the way to my seat in section 545, I happened to see Ogden walking into the suite level. He was right next to me. Too bad I’m not that annoying fan that begs people for autographs or something. I just let him go, but I have to admit that I was really excited to see him up close.

Now, for the game. Thank you Ravens defense! Thank you so much for making this game feel the way it was supposed to. Playing against the injury-ridden, Gus Frerotte-led Rams, I expected total domination…at least on the defensive side of the ball, and we got it. Five picks, a forced fumble, and 4 sacks made sure of that. As usual, the offence sputtered in the red zone, but at least McGahee got his first rushing TD as a Raven. He’s quickly growing as one of my favorite players on the field.

Boller was his typical self – fumbling the snap, fumbling after getting hit from behind, and tossing up a goofy interception, but he also did some really nice things. He stretched the field. I absolutely loved how the team took chances. I’m a firm believer that Mason, D-Will, Clayton, Heap, and now Figurs could make up one of the top 10 receiving corps in the NFL if the play calling just utilized them better. Boller at least tried to do that yesterday. For the first time this season, the opposing defense had to play honest against the Ravens. They couldn’t just set up to defend the short pass, and run. They had to respect the deep ball, and Boller made that happen. That’s right. I said it. Boller made it happen. He was far from perfect, but with him in there, the opponents had to play to the Ravens. The Ravens weren’t letting the defense force them to play safe. Plus, Boller took a bunch of tough hits yesterday and bounced back up. McNair can’t do that anymore. If McNair is 100%, then I’m for having him out there, but if he can’t get the ball down field, I have to say Boller is the guy (I just puked in my mouth a little).

Of course, I’m not going to read too much into this game. The Rams at full-strength would’ve been a better test, but the Ravens put away a team that they should’ve beaten. That’s the first sign of a good team. The second good thing I saw was a defense with swagger. If the Ravens defense needs to get that back against a weak opponent, so be it. As the confidence grows, so will the performances. As long as the defense keeps improving week-to-week, the Ravens will have a chance down the stretch to make the playoffs, but the only way they’re going to beat Pittsburgh, Indy, the Chargers, and the Patriots is to put up points.

Regardless, at the end of the day, I saw the Ravens win their 100th game in franchise history, and a team record-breaking 5 interceptions. Not bad…not bad at all.

Whether or not you’re into their music, you’d find me staring at you with very skeptical look if you told me that a Red Elvises show wasn’t fun. An Elvises show is nearly guaranteed to have you singing along to songs in broken English that you don’t even know the words to, and dancing around like an idiot with a poor equilibrium.

Last night I met Davis, Evans, and Evans’ uncle, Dave, at Club Café for yet another Red Elvises show. I have to say that there are few bands that I’ve seen that are as good live as the Elvises. I’ve only been let down once by their show, and that was purely because they didn’t have anyone on keyboards – something that I believe is a major part to their sound and stage dynamic.

Fortunately, Elena Shemankova was featured back on the keys. Although I’d love to see Schramm on the keys again, Elena is a great performer and definitely holds her own. She was a welcomed upgrade to the guitar player they added for the last show. One cool thing the Elvises brought this time around was a sax player! Although they didn’t need a sax player, the sound integrated really well into the show, and added a little extra dynamic to the stage.

The setlist was quite varied from the usual order. Lovepipe didn’t open the show, and we heard a lot of new stuff mixed in compared to usual. That was a welcomed change for me because I’ve been growing tired of the predictable set/set order no matter how great the performance. The new songs are pretty good and should anchor the new album to make it worth purchasing. As usual, Adam Gust’s drum solo was amazing. Whenever I watch him play, I start thinking to myself how he’s arguably the best drummer I’ve ever seen live. You’d have to watch him play to understand.

Overall, the band was very energetic, and definitely sold me on going again next time they’re in town. My only recommendation is that they get some new tour posters designed.

Despite my bad games last night, it was still the best night ever in my short time bowling. Davis bowled out of his mind, then we went to the bar at the lanes (Julie even joined us for a beer!) and we all enjoyed a ridiculous finish to the MNF game between Dallas and the Bills. Oh, and the Yankees were eliminated!!!

Davis is a beast. He threw 19 consecutive strikes across his first two games. It was so much fun seeing a glimpse of a former Davis on the lanes. I can’t wait to see him roll a 300. It has to happen again eventually. His 289 was just ridiculous. He ended up shooting 803 for the three games, but it wasn’t enough to carry us to more than one win since the other team shot the best first two games of their lives.

Julie, as usual, tore it up the last couple of games after she realized she had her watch on.

Me, well, I just sucked last night. My average was 136. I just need to start practicing again. According to Davis, I was throwing nice first balls, but I just didn’t have the confidence going into my spares. I need to start rolling more than one night a week. When I used to bowl 3-4 times a week, I was really confident and shooting 180+ most nights. Now, I’m just not feeling it.

I know I shouldn’t generalize. I’m also aware that living in Pittsburgh isolates my football fan experiences to this town for the most part, but why must the majority of Steelers fans that I sit near at Steelers games be such complete assholes? Seriously.

Yesterday I went to the Steelers/Seahawks game in 90-degree weather just for the hell of it, and I have to say, it was my worst experience ever at a football game. No one really cared about me because I dressed team-neutral and didn’t really cheer for anything that happened. I sort of just sat there as if I was scouting. Hell, maybe I was. Scouting the fans for the upcoming Ravens game at Heinz field. My findings?

I can’t stand being around Steelers fans. I sat right behind a group of Seahawks fans who were older (60ish), and obviously traveled to the game. They just watched the game and kept to themselves, but not the assholes next to me. Here’s the rundown:

1) The first asshole arrives, sits in his seat, and goes straight into the most overused bullshit in a Steelers fan’s repertoire, yelling the following at the Seahawks fans: “Hey. Hey. Did you see your trophy in the Great Hall? Yeah, we have 5 of ‘em. How many do you have?”

2) The stadium announcer announces Mike Holmgren, and asshole number two screams: “Get him a tissue! Get him a tissue!”

3) Later, during some super shitty song that plays at every Steelers game, there’s a part where the fans go “yeah” on every 2 count. Well, asshole number two felt the need to scream in the ears of the Seahawks fans…over and over for about 30 seconds. And I don’t mean scream scream. I mean veins-popping-in-his-neck screaming.

4) Asshole number three sat behind me. He insisted on having a coronary every time the refs made any call against the Steelers. He would start screaming at the top of his lungs until his voice practically died by the third quarter. He seriously thought that every call was bullshit and that the refs were out to give the game away. He was insane. Seriously. He would scream “that’s bullshit” over and over, then miss the call in his tantrum. The he would follow his nonsense with, “hey ref…what was the call?”

5) Asshole number four only achieved asshole status because he actually wore a shirt that said: “Ben is God” on it.

My gripes are simple. How I wish I was a 49ers fan and my team was playing the Steelers. Just once, ONCE, I’d love for the Steelers fans to try to throw their 5 Super Bowl rings shit at me, and be able to shit right in their mouths. Get over it. Most of these people weren’t even alive to enjoy 4 of the 5, so shut it.

Second, I hate Steelers fans talking about how the Seahawks fans are whiny. You all know damn well, that if the team on the other end of the questionable calls in Super Bowl XL was the Steelers, and they lost, the Steelers fans would be bitching until the end of time, so STFU. They’re still whining about Neil O’Donnell from 12 years ago. Time to grow up and realize that not everyone is still bummed about football happenings from years ago. There’s a reason why we grow older and time moves forward. It’s so we don’t end up like these assholes.

Next, Ben is not God, people. Ben is an average QB in a solid system who is only as good as the team around him. God supposedly created the Earth and Man. Ben had a 22 passer rating in a Super Bowl the Steelers won, unconvincingly.

Last, wash your damn terrible towel. Asshole number one’s terrible towel smelled like a towel that was left in the washer for 5 weeks, then dried. Thanks, Mr. Loudmouth Asshole! You stunk up the whole section by waving it around every three seconds.

I might just skip the Ravens game at Heinz. I’m sure I can sell my ticket for more money than my rent to some toolbox Steelers fan that will end up crying in his beer when the Steelers get eliminated in the first round of the playoffs. I just see the whole affair ending badly if I go. Not because I can’t handle the people screaming at me, but because I can’t stand voluntarily surrounding myself with assholes for 3 hours.

Um…9-7? Does anyone remember our Super Bowl run in 2000? I only mention it because today looked just like a game from the home stretch of that season. All defense, all Matt Stover, all boring, an appearance by Trent Dilfer. I am, by no means, saying that the Ravens are going to win the Super Bowl this year, but…seriously. Look at the game.

The highlights for me were the young o-line (3 rookies, 1 second year) holding their own, Willis McGahee, and the defense. I was especially excited to see Gaither out there. He’s so ridiculously huge and only 20. I also like McGahee…a lot. I am still in the belief that they need to run a lot more, especially with how downhill Willis seems to be running right now, but we’ll see how things go. The defense actually had some intensity yesterday, which is huge for the Ravens. They’ve definitely lacked that energy the last couple of weeks, so it was a welcomed change.

This week’s bowling league went much better for our team. For the first time this year, we took 2 out of 3 games despite giving up 126 pins each game. I felt a million times more comfortable from the onset last night. My first warm-up throw was a gutter ball, but I knew it was going to be a better night than the previous 2 Mondays. I just felt comfortable all around, and more importantly, confident in my approach and form.

I rolled a 139, 183, and a 179. My average of 167 is only 1 pin shy of my 168 league average, so I can’t complain. It’s the first week that my average shouldn’t drop which makes me happy.

I felt really good my first game, despite the low score. I was just off on a few spares, or I could’ve really had a good night. The night just got better from there. I was even able to beat Davis in the second game! As usual, Julie came up huge with her consistency. In the first game, she was clutch as she got 18 pins in the 10th frame to guarantee only our second victory of the year.

Call me optimistic, but with Julie bowling well, me picking my game up, and Davis doing his thing, I’m really thinking that we can go 6-6 to finish the season. I’m not sure if we’ll see that Greg guy again, but if he shows up, we may be able to do even better. We’ll see…

On the game:
I’m really starting to hate Brian Billick as the coach of the Ravens. Yeah, he’s arrogant. Yeah, he’s a prick. But, I just tried to overlook that with the way he turned last season around. This season, he’s back to his old self. His playcalling is atrocious and his awareness of the game is comical, at best. Why he didn’t throw the red flag in time on Jamal’s TD, I don’t know. Maybe the Ravens booth review team was slow on the call, but damn. I didn’t even get to see how close it was, but the Cleveland radio people thought it wasn’t a TD, so I’ll go with them. Ha ha. My biggest annoyance was watching pass play after pass play despite McGahee’s wonderful performance against the 29th worst run defense. He could’ve run all day, but as usual this year, Billick goes away from the run. Jamal definitely had a point about not being used enough in Baltimore.

I’m not sure how much I was ever on the McNair bandwagon, but last year our defense was keeping teams from scoring, thus his simple play was enough to manage games and win. Unfortunately, this year, whether it’s the loss of Pryce or maybe even Rolle, we’re getting rolled on in the air on defense. That’s okay, because we’re not really allowing a lot of points. The problem is McNair, especially with Billicks conservative play calling when we need a comeback, is killing us. As much as it pains me to say it, Boller may be our best option these days. He’s shown, although in only limited playing time, that he can manage a game better now. He has that zip to squeeze the ball into tight situations and the strength to go vertical. We need that vertical threat. We’re too easy to defend against. Predictable, short passing plays are tired and not getting it done in the red zone. Oh, and Stover missing two field goals yesterday didn’t help either. Let’s hope for a better season from this point on…and let’s also hope that Billick fires himself from being the offensive play caller. We have an offensive coordinator for that.

On my trip to the game and Cleveland Browns experience:
I made the drive from Pittsburgh to Cleveland yesterday. It was really exciting to get to go to a new stadium that I hadn’t been to, and experience football in Cleveland. Overall, I had a good time. Cleveland Browns Stadium is really nice as far as atmosphere goes. It’s almost completely closed in, so the noise actually stays inside…unlike at Heinz field. The halls were a little bland, but once you get to your seat, it’s a beautiful place. I was very impressed with the passion of the Browns fans. They were loud and proud, barking all game (literally). I hope they have a good year.

Plus, the fans were hardly as annoying as I had expected as far as heckling goes. Of course, I opted for upper level seats instead of sitting in the Dawg Pound, which may have helped. On the way in and out, I experienced some taunting, but for whatever reason (maybe the way I just laughed it off), it didn’t last long. In fact, I ended up talking football with a couple of them and sharing our collective hatred of the Steelers to pass the time walking to our cars. You definitely can’t blame people for talking trash, especially when this is their best start to a season in recent memory. Steelers fans are way worse in every way.

The ride home was enjoyable as I got to listen to the Steelers lose to the Cardinals, then listen as the callers called in acting like the season and their lives imploded.

It’s one thing to get excited about a game, or be bummed. It’s another to act like someone killed your puppy. It’s a game, people. You didn’t have any effect on the outcome, and tomorrow your life is going to be exactly the same. Be a fan, but don’t be damn moron. (That’s a note for all fans, not just Steelers fans, by the way)